no extra hands and yet loving it... quite.

i am helper-less since last week of december 2011. the last helper we had went to their province for her annual vacation but few days before she's supposed to come back she sent me an sms saying that her older sister is due to give birth and she needs to help her with her kids. hence, she won't be going back to us. whether she's saying the truth or not i do not care. i've been meaning to ditch her anyway but i was planning to do it after we've transferred to this house. she had giving me headaches anyway with her sneak-outs and other forms of stubbornness. i was really willing to let her go.

so the next question is: am i looking for her replacement? the truth is no, i am not looking for a replacement. not now, not even soon. i am still enjoying the privacy that having no stranger in the house brings. am enjoying this life that i don't have to adjust or makisama to anyone. am also enjoying the little savings monthly as i don't have to give someone her salary, not to mention the regular supply of toiletries and whats-not. it's also good that inigo is becoming responsible as i ask him to help me in the house by picking up his and even his brother's mess.

but i admit it's hard to juggle the tasks of taking care of the kids and the house. my eyebags are getting bigger as my sleep is becoming shorter. i had to take more vitamins now as my energy can't keep up with the chores. even my quality time with the boys were affected. i can no longer sit down with them for more than 30 minutes except during inigo's learning time which we do when theo is having his afternoon nap, though i sometimes catch myself dozing off with him.

my life is bitter-sweet now but still i prefer it this way. as i've always said, i can bear an aching body but not the kunsiminsyon having a househelp bring.