Thursday, August 28, 2008

what MY preschooler really needs (sharing a well-written article)

i grabbed this article from the pinoyhomeschool yahoogroup, which i joined in recently. it's been in my inbox for weeks (or months--that long!) but it's just this afternoon when i had the time to read the other mails. this one made my day as it validated what i know by heart is good for our son:

1. strong attachment is ALWAYS right and good. i winced on the oldies' advice of "not sanayin sa karga ang bata". gusto ko minsan isagot, "kelan pa... kung mas mabigat pa sa akin?" hehe. babies are babies so give them what they need most--time and emotional nurturing.

2. free-wheeling and unstructured early education. lots of exposures to the outside world as much as possible. this is one of the reason's why we bring iñigo even when he was still a toddler to zoos, gardens, farms, and recently, in the campsite! =) i don't rush him to learn the alphabets, and the numbers, and the shapes. i'll just get frustrated anyway. hahaha. i'm contented right now that his motor skills is very, very good.

and lastly,

3. quality time is quantity time. though this seems to be better said than done. well, let's just hope for the better for our family. GOD BLESS!

***

What Your Preschooler Really Needs

Susan Lemons

 

The world has a lot to say about parenting nowadays. From Dr. Spock to Dr. Phil, from the Super Nanny to our own families, a plethora of experts scold us with a never-ending barrage of advice--most of it conflicting. The newspapers and magazines scream at us about the needs of children and the latest unbiased study, while the publishing companies profit from the confusion by churning out numerous books on parenting every year. Slick ad campaigns report that parents need only buy the latest educational toy, or enroll their innocents in the newest educational program to guarantee academic success and future happiness for their children.

Meanwhile, parents are stressed and confused. According to CBS News, 54% of parents with 2-5 year olds admit to feeling worried about their children's academic progress, and more than 90% think that starting early is the key to success. Parents are enrolling toddlers into rigorous academic tutorial programs in record numbers, and routinely over-schedule their youngsters with play-dates, lessons, sports, and classes, all in hopes of giving their children some sort of advantage.

Whatever happened to childhood?

Homeschoolers are not immune to these phenomena, either. We see what is going on around us, and often feel the need to compete with our neighbors--no matter how hard we try not to. Many of us feel pressured to prove ourselves to our own extended families, as well. To make things worse, the push for early learning has now trickled all the way down to the curriculum suppliers; some are now providing academically based curriculum for children as young as two years of age. The result of all this? Parents who wonder, What is best for my child? Am I doing enough? What does my preschooler really need?

My answer: Preschoolers need what they have always needed. Preschoolers haven't changed. Preschoolers need their parents.

Everything your preschooler needs to know can be taught simply through good parenting. Now, what I mean by good parenting, is warmly responsive, loving and consistent care, balanced with discipline (Moore's Home Grown Kids).

The simplest definition of good parenting I've ever heard is from Anne Ortland, who says, "Good parenting is simply becoming what you should be--and then staying close enough to your children that it will rub off." She challenges us further by asking, "What will you become, so that your children will do great things for God?"

Mrs. Ortland's quotes neatly summarize what the Bible says about discipling our children. Proverbs 23:26 says, "My son, give me thine heart, and let thine eyes observe my ways." Luke 6:40 says, "The disciple [we could insert student, or child here] is not above his master [parents]; but every one that is perfect shall be as his master."

I believe this is the greatest challenge facing Christian parents today; becoming what we should be and setting a proper example for our children. I've heard it said that when our children are misbehaving, we should always look to ourselves first--because our children are like a mirror, reflecting with their behaviors all we do and say. Good parenting is just as much about controlling ourselves as it is controlling our children--rememberi ng that as much is caught as is taught.

Besides becoming who we should be, and discipling our children, there are specific things good parents can do to help their young children learn and mature:

Remember what your children need most--YOU. More than the newest learning toy or curriculum you could buy, your children need both quality and quantity time with you. Preschoolers spell love T-I-M-E.

Provide for your children's emotional needs by allowing your children to become closely attached to you. These attachments are normal and healthy for young children. In fact, children who are strongly attached to their parents grow up to be confident, independent, and emotionally stable.

Develop a sensible, regular routine for daily life and stick to it as much as possible. A regular time for meals, snacks, naps, and stories provides children with security, and keeps them on an even keel emotionally. Bring your preschooler into your daily routine, talking about everything you do. True, your bed won't be made quite as neatly, but children's best play is Mommy or Daddy's work. Let your children learn while keeping you company--not only how to work, but how to count and measure while cooking, science while gardening, and so on.

Read, sing and talk with your children.

  • Reading aloud to preschoolers is such a joy. Get expressive and use different voices while you read, pausing to ask your children about the pictures or about what might happen next. Encourage your children to chime in with books that have repetitive phrases. Look for books that will answer those why questions.
  • Sing: You don't have to have perfect pitch to enjoy music with your children. Many finger plays don't involve singing at all, just chanting in a sing-songy voice. And if you don't remember the classic songs and finger plays of childhood, there are plenty of CD's to help you learn. Your voice is a musical instrument that goes with you wherever you go, and no matter how horrible you think you sound, your children love your voice and need to hear it. Also, be sure and help your children develop a taste for the classics by exposing them to the best in classical, folk, and religious music.
  • Talk: Help your children grow their vocabularies and base of knowledge by talking to them about everything, and expounding on their speech. For example, if your child says, Mommy, look at that funny bird, you might say, Yes! That bird is called a sparrow. Do you see his brown feathers? Talk to your children constantly, about everything you are doing. Talk to them about everything they see, labeling things with their proper names.

Provide a stimulating home environment rich in books, music, and open-ended toys that grow with your children. Open-ended toys are toys that can be used many different ways. These toys encourage pretend play, imagination and creativity. Toys like play-dough, blocks, cars, dolls, puzzles, and Legos fit the bill. Keep paper, crayons, felt tipped pens, and other art supplies available for your children to use any time. And don't forget children's favorite play--outside play with pets, swing sets, balls, worms and tricycles. Children need time outside to play, explore, and run off steam every day the weather permits.

Let early learning be child-centered and developmentally appropriate. Don't rush into formal academics; instead, explore your children's interests through picture books and real-life experiences. Preschoolers don't need to do any sit-down, written work; let them master pre-writing skills through drawing and crafts, and teach concepts through play, discussion, and games.

Provide your children the opportunity to succeed by allowing plenty of practice with new skills and concepts through repetition. Repetition strengthens and reinforces learning.

Most importantly, disciple your children in the ways of the Lord. Introduce favorite Bible stories and themes of the Bible, and use them to teach simple doctrinal truths like God loves me, God made me, Jesus is God's son, and so on. Teach, practice, and train to develop good habits, manners and morals.

Parents who endeavor to do these things need never fear that they are not providing enough for their children. In fact, they are providing the very best for their children. No educational toy, preschool program, or expert preschool teacher can provide the love, individualized attention, and discipleship training loving parents can. I know this from first-hand experience-- I used to be one of those expert preschool teachers. When I was on playground duty, children would gather around me to talk or be held. I loved those children; but that love in no way compares to the love I have for my own children. After the first of my four was born, I realized that as a preschool teacher, I was nothing more than a poor substitute for Mom.  Those children weren't gathered around me because I was such a wonderful teacher; they were simply hungry for love and attention--the kind of love and attention they should have received from their own parents. Much of their day was spent in loneliness and confusion.

Don't let the messages of the world make you doubt your decision to disciple your children at home. Stand firm in the face of the expert's advice. Your children will never need anyone or anything more than they need you. Let them have the love, time, and attention of their own parents. That's all they really need.

----------

Susan Lemons and her husband have been married for 23 years, and have homeschooled their four children (ages 19, 15, 6 and 4) from birth. Susan has earned both Associate and Bachelor Degrees in Child Development, and serves the homeschooling community as a mentor, first contact for new homeschoolers, and conference speaker.

This article was originally published in the Mar/Apr '07 issue of Home School Enrichment Magazine. For more information, visit

Friday, August 22, 2008

little tot means big laughs

iñigo is now used on the word "time-out"... don't ask why. =P i am even surprised sometimes on how cooperative he can be to the extent that he'll get his time-out chair (there's a designated chair for this) from his room as soon as he heard the word, put it on where it should be and sit without any complain. the funny thing is he'll smile to me first as if he's way to tell me that he obliged, before he'll fuss or whine... ay time-out pala s'ya. hehe.

there are even moments when he'd volunteer himself for a time-out as soon as he realized that "mommy... mad" and declare for himself a "tam-out". 'yan ang bata... may kusa... =D

it was two or three nights ago when i put him on a time-out again. this time it's me who took the chair from his room and had him sit in one of the corners of our sala. i saw his attempt to stand up and wander around the house but i was quick to remind him that he's for a time-out and he should only sit down until the time i tell him it's over. since i was a busy with some chores, i left him with jude who was also busy reading a magazine. not a minute passed when i looked back to where he was and lo and behold, iñigo was walking around the house with the chair on his butt (hawak-hawak ng mokmok!). i tried not to laugh and give him a scolding for his naughtiness but i can't help it as jude was already laughing hard, i gave in and laughed to my heart's content.

naisahan na naman... =D

***

this was only narrated to me by our former househelp, manang fe:

iñigo: manan, mommy celofon kirirrrring (manang, mommy's celfone rings)

manang fe: ano yun?

iñigo: celofone kirirrrring-kirirrring

manang fe: (slow, kulang kasi sa vitamins) ano kamo? anong kiriring?

iñigo: celofone kirirrring... det it... hawo, dido pay (celfone rings... get it and say 'hello, iñigo is playing')

ayus, memoryado na ang dialogue. =D

***

it's like an afternoon soap for us whenever i bid goodbye to the little tot.

me: mommy has to go...

iñigo: (in tears) no like!

me: you go to sleep now and when you wake up you'll already see mommy in the house.

iñigo: no like seep (don't like to sleep)!

me: okay, what do you want (last resort, bribery! haha)? mommy will bring it home.

iñigo: fish faish (french fries), aysh keam (ice cream)... hamberjer (hamburger)...  babye mommy!

...and he's all smiles in that last statement!

yun lang pala katapat ko. =(

***

oh, there are many more stories i wish to tell here but it's either i have limited time to type them down here or i have limited storage space in my memory (i blame it on the epidural i had. hehe.)

but there's one thing that never skips me--the everyday realization that our son is growing up fast.

read this:

he now knows how to turn on and operate most of our electronic appliances inside the house (and he never forgets to plug them first, que horror!) such as electric fan, dvd, tv, computer, and component;

and he knows to turn them off when they are not in use... i'm happy here, mabuti na lang hinde sa tatay nagmana =P;

he knows the way going to the mall and he will tell us if we're going to the opposite or wrong direction... "daddy, mall there!" (can you fool a certified mall rat? NEVER!);

he knows when to complain when it's "tafic! (traffic)";

he chooses the clothes and shoes he'll wear whenever we're going out and daddy or mommy has to abide (talk about being adamant... err, stubborn);

he's very good in sweet-talking and cajoling now like when he wants to go outside the house, he'd tell me, "mommy, like coke? buy coke... tawa (tara)!" o 'di ba? marunong mambola! hehe.

aside from mcdonald and jollibee, he has another two favorite places on earth--chooking (chowking) and timezone! all these inside his most favorite place--MALL.

and if i'm going to sum up in one sentence most of these truths about my son right now... walang duda, he's becoming more like mommy everyday. =D

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Friday, August 15, 2008

iñigo discovered how the chinese eat

we were in binondo area last sunday when jude craved for noodles and dumsum as he spotted an authentic chinese restaurant near the parking area. as we entered the resto i observed that all their clients are full-blooded chinese except for us. hence, it was not surprising that chopsticks and ceramic spoon came along with our ordered foods, which were just wanton noodles and fried dimsum. i tried using the chopsticks, which i seldom do (nahiya lang ako humingi ng fork. hehe) and iñigo followed suit.

look at the pictures below. jude and i were surprised to see him using the chopsticks for the noodles as we never taught him how, he just observed us and figured it out all by himself. and i was also amazed that his fine motor skills is already well-developed at his age.

 

 

 

move over spoon and fork as chinese-wannabe iñigo is now into chopsticks! =D

 

Thursday, August 14, 2008

what's in our joy list?

i was inspired by this article by bo sanchez: http://bosanchez.ph/what-is-your-joy-list/. my other email address is subscribed to his site and once a week i get my weekly dose of inspirational stories and that one really struck a chord, which prompted me to make my own joy list here in our site. the article reminded me to be happy NO MATTER WHAT. there are lot of things that bring me down or give me a lot of stress (having no househelp or yaya is number one!) these days but the joy list helped me to consume myself instead with happy thoughts.

here now is our joy list:

1. the fact that we are all--jude, me, iñigo and our other loved ones--are all healthy is more than enough to thank GOD.

2. our stable income and the opportunities that come along our way.

3. the frequent travels and trips to different places. and i'm praying that there's more to come. =)

4. weekly family date in the mall and in hain's for pancit bijon (mababaw lang kaligayahan ko...hehe).

5. iñigo's antics, which always brings our house down.

6. friends who we miss and who are also missing us as we're missing in action for a long time now.

7. marathon, runs, biking, and other sports activities for jude.

8. dvd shows for iñigo.

9. shopping spree for me. =)

10. the afternoon walks and ballgames with iñigo along our village's roads.

11. jogging and any chance to sweat out.

12. quiet moments at night for jude and me (ops-ops, it's not what you're thinking! =) i just love the time that we talk on anything-under-the-sun when the little tot is already asleep... but it can also lead to that... haha.)

i can only think of 12 now but i'm hoping to add more.

how about you? hope you can also share your own joy list in your site. the longer the list means the more blessings you have and the more grateful you are to GOD.

 

 

Monday, August 11, 2008

bye-bye pick-up... hello trooper!

we never thought it would be that fast. jude posted our for-sale pick-up in sulit.com last thursday night and a lot of interested buyers emailed and called him the following morning. one of them immediately went to our house saturday afternoon as he was really too eager to see the vehicle and after a round of drive-test and engine check-up, and a little haggling over our price, we were able to close the deal! he went back this afternoon as he promised and paid us in cash; hence, with a heavy heart, we say "adieu, isuzu pick-up!" you served us well in just short span of time that we had you. =( how can we possibly transport the refrigerator and freezer borrowed from our mommies so we can use them in our store if not for you! now the problem is: how are we gonna give them back? =P

one reason by the way why jude disposed the pick-up is he's head-over-heels interested with the isuzu trooper his best buddy, dylan, is selling. the trooper is actually already with us since june, he's just waiting for us to raise enough cash for the payment. he never entertained any buyer--just jude. and the price is really a steal for a 4x4 so jude grabbed the chance and decided to sell the pick-up since we have no extra cash for another vehicle (i actually made him choose... hehe).

hay... what's with 4x4 vehicles that make guys drool over them? dylan got himself a better-looking 4x4 that's why he disposed the trooper. another friend of jude who happens to be iñigo's ninong has a land rover while another friend has... tan-ta-na-nan... a range rover!!! so imagine my pity for jude when he only got himself an old model of isuzu trooper. =( but what the heck! with the soaring fuel prices these days, we're better off with this car. at least it's not as fuel-hungry as the other cars i mentioned so we can still enjoy long road trips without the guilt-feeling.

 

weekend in enchanted kingdom

foreword: i was thinking of making another album for the pictures of our EK trip but when i saw how pixelated they are since we just made use of my camera celfone i just had them posted here in our blog so i can "manipulate" the resolution. hehe.

***

i mentioned here months ago that we were given ride-all-you-can tickets and wizard monies for EK and since one of the tickets will expire this august, we decided to squeeze in an EK visit last saturday night inspite of our busy schedule--it's also a chance for us to unwind. the place anyway is just 15-minutes away from our house so what else is gonna stop us? thanks weather for it's also cool and dry that night.

we reached the park at 6 pm, had an early dinner in its resto, strolled around the park and rode some of the rides. btw, it's my first time in EK (do i hear laughs? =) i'm not fond of theme parks and carnivals po kasi) and i tried the anchor's away while jude whose last visit to EK was five or six years ago tried the space shuttle--and he enjoyed it, grabe!

but guess who had the best time that night? our little boy of course! he loved the rides, the game booths, and the foodies he had while we're inside the park.

below are some of the pix (won't post them all, it will take me hours to upload with my zzz internet connection... haha!)

iñigo enjoying his horse ride

iñigo enjoying his hotdog

iñigo loved the panda bear ride best! it took us a hard time getting him down from it.

in the arcade with daddy

there they are... our first family visit to EK pictures. with the place's proximity to our house and with some more free tickets in the bag, am sure there will be more EK visits to come. =)

belated happy birthday to iñigo's daddy and my love! =)

i'm a bad wife for posting late jude's birthday celebration. we actually had it simple then as we were both busy that day--jude renewed his driver's license in LTO and i dropped by in my office as there's something urgent for me to address. so there was no chance to prepare for a simple bash or whatever. after jude and iñigo fetched me in my office in alabang, we drove straight to paseo de sta. rosa (jude insisted that no malling for his special day... sige na nga... hehe) and had dinner in one of our favorite restos--kanin club--and ordered the special dishes they are known for--crispy dinuguan, sinangag na sinigang, and lumpiang sariwa.

we all had a feast! even the little boy who never failed to wow us with his big appetite, went home with a full stomach. look at his lovely smile after he finished his share of dinuguan:

his teeth need an extra brushing eh? =D

so that was how we celebrated jude's birthday last monday--so simple and yet intimate. i still don't even have a gift for him until now. can my movie treat (the dark knight) last friday count? hehe.

i still have plans of giving him something nice as soon as i got my money; but my problem is i don't know what to give him (it's always been my problem!). can i just wrap iñigo and tie him with pretty ribbons as he'd always muse that his son is the best gift he had every received? =)

a photo of the birthday boy and his "best gift":

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

rosaries for little hannah (please read)

hi, there! i'm shelving the topic i'd like to post today to ask a favor from you, my dear friends and kins here in multiply, to check out the site of little hannah:

http://hannahysabelle.multiply.com/photos/album/20/rosaries_for_hannah

it's a nawie sister who first introduced me to this angel and learning her story and early battles in life was a very humbling experience for me--and shame on me who would complain for petty matters concerning my son!  i realized i wasn't a good steward. and i salute hannah's parents as their faith in GOD seems never faltered despite the trials. may they serve as inspiration to us. godspeed!

 

 

Friday, August 1, 2008

money-making internet sites

i got the list below from blogger talk and i thought of sharing it to you, especially to my fellow wifey and mommy-friends here who are in the lookout for other sources of income.

but before you begin clicking, my disclaimer first: i haven't tried any of these sites so i can't vouch if they are legitimate or true to its words or merely scams. i suggest you google the site first and read feedbacks of those who have already tried them, okay?