no extra hands and yet loving it... quite.

i am helper-less since last week of december 2011. the last helper we had went to their province for her annual vacation but few days before she's supposed to come back she sent me an sms saying that her older sister is due to give birth and she needs to help her with her kids. hence, she won't be going back to us. whether she's saying the truth or not i do not care. i've been meaning to ditch her anyway but i was planning to do it after we've transferred to this house. she had giving me headaches anyway with her sneak-outs and other forms of stubbornness. i was really willing to let her go.

so the next question is: am i looking for her replacement? the truth is no, i am not looking for a replacement. not now, not even soon. i am still enjoying the privacy that having no stranger in the house brings. am enjoying this life that i don't have to adjust or makisama to anyone. am also enjoying the little savings monthly as i don't have to give someone her salary, not to mention the regular supply of toiletries and whats-not. it's also good that inigo is becoming responsible as i ask him to help me in the house by picking up his and even his brother's mess.

but i admit it's hard to juggle the tasks of taking care of the kids and the house. my eyebags are getting bigger as my sleep is becoming shorter. i had to take more vitamins now as my energy can't keep up with the chores. even my quality time with the boys were affected. i can no longer sit down with them for more than 30 minutes except during inigo's learning time which we do when theo is having his afternoon nap, though i sometimes catch myself dozing off with him.

my life is bitter-sweet now but still i prefer it this way. as i've always said, i can bear an aching body but not the kunsiminsyon having a househelp bring.

he was just once my little boy

someone shared the video "the gift of an ordinary day" by katrina kenison with me and it brought me to tears as soon as i watched it.

here's the link:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=olSyCLJU3O0&noredirect=1

i can give a lot of reasons why i can relate with ms. kenison's telling, and one obvious reason is am also a mom of two boys, who i now dutifully make peanut butter sandwich and baking soda volcanoes for. but there was one episode in my last week which already made me cry as it taught me to let go

it happened before the kids' bedtime. we were all--inigo, theo, and I--in the shower and i was giving the two boys a bath. i immediately brought theo to our bedroom after i have washed him to dress him up in his pajamas. but before we left i told inigo to wait for me so he can have his turn in bathing. it took me a few minutes to go back to the bathroom and as soon as i stepped in inigo proudly announced that he's already done with his bath. i was doubtful on how it went so i took the soap and tried to soap his neck, but he told me, "i already soaped my neck, mommy." i went down to his torso but he objected, "i also soaped my tummy." i went down further but he kept on telling me that it's all done. i paused then nonchalantly told this to him, "awww... so mommy doesn't need to give you a bath na pala." to which he replied, "yes, i can already do it." i quite absorbed the fact that taking a bath is already one of the many things he's trying to do on his own lately but i don't know what's with me that night that made me utter this... "so mommy doesn't have to take care of you." he cut me off saying, "but mommy, i'm already a big boy." note that he wasn't mad when he said this. he was in fact apologetic over the truth that he's now a big boy and he wanted to do most things on his own. it shook me and i realized that i was in tears. i was emotional. there he was facing me, my used-to-be baby who kept on calling mommy for everything but now wanted to have his freedom during bath time and in other things. and there i was, the mom, who's afraid of the future that she's already irrelevant in her son's life.

to say that we have to let our kids spread their wings and let them fly is easier said than done. too much struggle is involved especially for a mom who sees her kids almost 24/7. but i do hope that i will have the grace to learn to let them go when the due time comes. but for now, i will enjoy the everyday gift of having them and that i am the center of their universe.

inigo joined the kiddo-prenuer bazaar

inigo had been bugging me for the longest time that we hold a garage sale in our... uhm, garage. :) and for the longest time i've been planning to organize one together with my friends but for many reasons it didn't materialize. that's why when i saw the facebook ad of the organizer of kiddo-prenuer bazaar calling for participants i immediately inquired for a slot. luckily i was able to get one. inigo was so excited when he found out about this and told others that he will have a garage sale. lol

this bazaar is a first of its kind in the country as it's participants should be kids and the target market are also kids. inigo was one of the youngest participants at age five. but he was so excited and prepared for this event. prior to the bazaar day, he made his own flyer and paraphernalia which i directed him to do. he also helped me prepare the products he's going to sell, which are some of his and theo's pre-loved things and brand new and second-hand books.

he was also a good salesman during the actual activity. he was so eager to make a sale that he approached his customers with a plastic bag in his hands and asked them to already put whatever they're looking at in it. hehe.

we ended the day happy (and tired for me) as we're able to exceed our sales target. inigo had a good start as an enterprenuer that's why we're joining again this march 2012 - yihee!

by the way, the bazaar happened last 5 december 2011 in rockwell, makati.

our hopes for 2012

...is that we can transfer to a new house, and this is what we're going to do tomorrow :)

...travel to more places in the philippines, preferably in batanes and bicol, boracay trip is already booked

...have jude's old trooper replaced *fingers-crossed*

...save more for the kids' college education

...spend more time at home and catch up with our reading

...exercise more often and commit to our health and fitness regime

...for mommy to have a business (though im wondering now if i can still manage this as am already helper-less and i don't intend to get a replacement soon, and i also plan to formally homeschool inigo by june)

...and 'give back' more than what we used to in terms of resources and time.

...and probably to have another bundle of joy? let's see. :)

2011: another year full of blessings

another year has passed and i have to do another review of the year went by, which is 2011.

it was a good year for us, a very good one in fact. if i can ask God if He can pattern the following years to 2011, i would. there were challenges and problems of course but nothing major nor serious as what 2010 had given us. the whole family (except for inigo during the last quarter of the year as he was confined because of pneumonia) was healthy. we were also good financially. we traveled a lot. and best of all jude and i fortified our marriage by attending a marriage encounter seminar. we were also happy parents as both inigo and theo were growing up well.

we had three major trips and traveled to three countries and one local destination last year. one of these trips was unplanned but God probably really wanted us to be complete when inigo celebrates his fifth birthday so he gave jude a surprise bonus which covers our expenses. this was in malaysia where jude went for a business trip last july and we--moi, inigo, and theo--followed. since singapore was only a hundred or more kilometers away we decided to see for the first time this country.



prior to malaysia and singapore, we've also flown to hongkong last february.

lastly, we went to the island of camiguin for our sixth wedding anniversary last october. it was a grand vacation (we did nothing but sleep and swim in the island!) except for the 'grand' travel we did going there and back to manila--oh boy, it was tedious!

it's also in 2011 when we started some family activities like kite-flying and fishing. jude was complaining that we're spending too much time in the malls every weekend so we thought of activities which we can all do together but the kids, especially inigo, will also enjoy.

we also did few day trips to nasugbu batangas...

we're also happy and grateful that the kids accomplished many things and reached important milestones in 2011. inigo was able to overcome his fears and learned to ditch the diaper when doing #2. he also learned to swim and be more aggresive in playing soccer. while theo was able to catch up with his milestones and now amazes us with his skills and expanded vocabulary.

but what we're so happy about is we're able to give more time for our faith and serve God in 2011. it was truly a blessing for us since we felt that our marriage has another purpose aside from raising our kids, and we hope that this will continue until we grow old. amen.

theo at adorable-terrible two

theo is adorable. he'd me in the cheek, nose, forehead, and lips. unwarranted, he'd throw his arms around and gives me a tight hug especially when

he knows all the colors with orange and purple as his favorites. we're learning the shapes as of now

he talks a lot and can string words already, sometimes in sentences.

the extra challenge that is budgeting

i am inspired to write this because there were other misis who were curious on how our household was able to save when only one of us is working and yet we can afford little luxuries like traveling. according to them, it is so hard nowadays to budget their income and to see some money left for savings. the truth is, our household is not actually an exception. i am doing the envelopes system and logged our expenses diligently to track where our money is going but at the end of the day, i still get headaches over managing our budget. it doesn't help that the cost of grocery items we usually buy, the diesel, and the electricity keep on increasing that's why i have to cut corners in some of our expenses to afford them.

am not sure if these tricks would work for you but let me share them anyway...

1. we keep aside our savings first... then the expenses follow. had it been the other way around, it's definitely, surely zero savings for us. temptations are everywhere especially when you live in makati where restaurants surround you and malls are just a few kilometers away from the house. how do we do this? jude has two deductions from his monthly salary which goes to their company's cooperative and company's stocks. aside from this, we started to invest last year in a club share which is payable for three years thru post-dated checks. so definitely we have to allot for this.

2. we work on a budget most of the time, if not always. we always set a limit for our eat-outs, shopping, trips, parties, etc. i work on budget which is not only our household can afford but is also comfortable for us to spend (capacity is not the same as willingness). even for our monthly expenses I set a limit for our groceries and allowances. it's nice to have yogurt and expensive fruits everyday but that would mean more thousands of pesos to add in my budget. and oh... we also set limit on the financial support we give. this must be tough to some but we chose to limit it if we want to realize our financial goals for the family.

2. we go for the cheaper alternative if possible. it was three or four months ago when i started to observe that my monthly budget for food and groceries was already small. but instead of increasing its budget, which is not possible anyway since our disposable income is fixed until jude gets another raise, i downgraded to  cheaper brands for products like detergents, theo's diaper, cleaning products, etc... but that is, if quality isn't an issue.

there's also a wisdom in surf's lumen advertisement years ago... why buy oranges when you can get vitamin c from dalandan? and that's what we do now... :)

3. if applicable, we buy second-hand items. we realized the practicality of buying second-hand items for some of the things we want for ourselves. tour yourself around our house and you'll find some things which we bought as second-hands but still in good condition and at very affordable prices. the kids' slide, the narra chairs, and this desktop am using right now are just some of the few.

4. i raid sales and buy much as i can. i don't shop much at divisoria especially for our personal things... why? because the quality of most items there really suck. there may be good finds but i have to spend hours to scour the alleys--waste of time! what i do instead is raid warehouse sales of branded products during christmas season.  thanks to my network as am always updated. and as much as possible i hoard from these sales, usually for a year-long of use. this really saves as a lot of money since i seldom buy at regular prices.

5. we avoid unnecessary expenses. - other mommies were scrambling to have tickets for disney live but i did not not bother--i found its rates too expensive! and since my kids had already been to disneyland why would i bother to see them here in metro manila? i also cannot find the reason why i have to pay php 500 to run when i can jog or run in the park without touching my wallet. these things are really waste of money if you ask me.

and oh, by the way, i seldom check the groupon sites. if i want to purchase something at a promo price, i ask friends to alert me. such sites are full of temptations so avoid it if i must! hehehe.

6. we indulge, but there were trade-offs for this. our family loves to travel and we do this as long as budget and time permits. no, we don't feel guilty for doing this. because we do deprive ourselves too of some things we want like watching concerts or musical plays. cirque de soleil was here in manila last july and i was like, "oh, i need to watch them!" jude already gave me the approval to book a ticket for myself (plan was i will be just going out with a friend) but i backed out since it will still take php 3,000 from our savings and we just came from a trip.

we also teach the kids the same thing. we also let them splurge in some things they like but it's always that they must let go of another thing.

7. generosity doesn't have to be pricey for us - i cringe whenever people declare after christmas that they made their loved ones very happy with their gifts BUT rant about their outstanding balance in their credit card bill/s. this made me ask:. do we really have to put ourselves in a financial mess just to prove that we love our family and friends?

8. we try to be money-smart - hmm... how should i explain this? it's like when we have arrears in our dues but we're not in a rush to settle it since it doesn't earn any interest over time. so what we do instead is we use that money first for other things which can bring savings for us in the long run.

in a nutshell, it's analyzing first the pros and cons of spending, especially one which involves a big amount of money.

this ends my list of wise-spending tips. budgeting for me is all about setting priorities. we listed down what values to us most and it's where we bring our money.

hope i was able to help. :)