a joyful 2012

God is good. though there was something which broke our hearts in 2012 He gave us many reasons to cheer for last year. my miscarriage last april was our saddest moment that year but we easily recovered because there were more things to be happy for and worth remembering.


the dream lot

it's last year that He provided us the resources to pursue a dream which jude and i have even before we got married, which is to live someday in tagaytay area. jude was able to purchase a lot on a discounted price near potter's ridge hotel in alfonso, cavite. we're able to pay the equity and we're hoping that we could settle there soon. we do miss the promdi life. :D

"it's green everywhere i look."

my access to freedom

lol. pardon me but they say that having your own automobile is your access.... though learning how to drive is the freedom itself (and that's what i don't have until now). finally jude's 4-year old plan of giving me my own car had finally come true. the kids never stepped inside jude's old trooper again... their mommy, too. hehe.

yes. i still don't know how to drive and i am disappointing the husband.

homeschooling inigo: a bitter-sweet endeavor

our schedule from monday to friday since june 2012 is like this:

morning - prepare and eat breakfast. don't ask about the exact time as it can be sooo late that your eyes might pop out and utter "WHAT???" when you read it. but if i have to bring theo to school then our morning usually starts at 8 am, except for the daddy who's still in bed before noon. hehe.

11 am - jude teaches math to iñigo. this usually starts from 11 am to 11:30. if jude is busy or has to report in the office in the morning and i feel that he's behind in this subject... i pitch in.

1 pm - lunch.

2 pm - cleaning up time.

3 pm - put theo to nap. inigo's 'learning time' with me starts a little after theo dozes off. i have a big problem if theo refuses to take a nap.

5 pm - kids' time to play in the outdoor play area. if we need to extend the learning time then there's no playtime.

if you think that we're religious on this schedule then let me tell you that we're NOT. there were days when chores and errands can be overwhelming that i had to bump off the learning time... or laziness strikes and going to the mall or letting them play (while i mind my own business) were grander ideas.

but of course there's a payment for these; hence i sometimes see myself pushing iñigo to finish one workbook in one day so we can catch up with the curriculum. as of this writing, we're only one week behind and that's because both inigo and i felt of extending the christmas break until first week of january this year.

during the first week of our homeschooling

so what is it like to teach my own child? fulfilling. it may sound cliche but it's true. it gives me a little pride that i was the only person who taught my son how to read like a third-grader and solve math problems which involve borrowing for substraction. i know it isn't much for some but for me it's a biggie. i was afraid before that i might not be able to teach him well because i'm not knowledgeable enough and/or lack teaching skills but by grace of God my son is learning from me. one big benefit of homeschooling is it really gives me an idea of my child's learning skill so I adjust my method accordingly. especially that he's in the level one step higher for his age so his cognitive skill and attention span should also be considered. patience is really a valuable tool in homeschooling. i always try my best to keep my cool but i admit that there were few episodes when i turned to be a monster mom-teacher especially when he wasn't cooperating. this i think is one of the drawbacks of being a teacher to my own son. as i also had to carry the burden of educating him, which is just as harder as disciplining, we have more moments together giving me more opportunities to see his goodness, as well as his flaws.

but if there's one thing i hate about homeschooling... it is the checking of workbooks and computing his grades! it's an ordeal for me that's why i salute all the teachers who do not only check and compute grades for one kid but for 30 or more.

by the way, iñigo is currently enrolled in grade one level in peniel christian school which is based in cainta, rizal . we came to know the school upon the recommendation of one of our wedding sponsors whose child were also homeschooled and enrolled in the same school. it is a regular school but they offer homeschooling program with a choice of curriculum--whether theirs or school of tomorrow, which is a homeschooling organization in the philippines. peniel accepted him based on his preschool's recommendation and his reading ability.

i try to make his school life as normal as possible. though we missed the educational trip that his school organized we made a few for him such as visit to luneta and fort santiago last national heroes' day. he also joined his younger's field trip in mind museum in the fort. as for his social development... he's not zero on this as he has built some friendships among the kids in our building for the past few months. lately, upon learning the national anthem thru youtube, he's been singing "lupang hinirang' almost everyday, similar to what regular school kids do before their classes start.

so is inigo missing anything because he doesn't go to a regular school? hmmm... probably it's baon. hehe

trying his best to enunciate the words in the "lupang hinirang" correctly.

 

the boy has the talent!

it was after the soccer class when inigo's coach approached us and asked about his age. inigo just turned six that time. she opined that the kiddo is already quite good in soccer for his age. she further thought that he has the 'potential' and wished that we can send him every weekend for training. inigo joining competitions is not a far-fetched idea, according to her.

hearing those words from the coach was a like receiving a trophy for inigo--also for me and jude for the efforts in sending him to his soccer class almost every weekend even when we didn't want to leave the house. but we happily do it for our eldest son as we (objectively speaking) know that inigo really has IT to be great in this sports. we saw him making four goals in just one scrimmage. that is out of four goals which his team got... yes, he made all four! :)

i asked jude on his thoughts on inigo's talent in football as we were walking towards our car. while the coach said inigo is great the daddy said he isn't. there's still a lot of techniques and skills which inigo has yet to learn.

okay, mr. footballer... i heard you. :P

the boys' birthdays

i cannot sleep without making a post on my children's birthdays this year. they are milestones and milestones should not only be celebrated but documented, too.

iñigo's 6th birthday

it was on 8 july 2012. he thought of many themes including soccer, dinosaurs, and superman. but a month prior to his birthday he thought of the avengers as he became a fan after watching the movie. we held a small party for him at home and it was well-attended by our families and friends, as well as the birthday boy's friends in the building. i ended up wasted that night as i cleaned the house, cooked the party foods, and entertained the guests but it's nothing compared to the happiness kuya had on his big day.

the birthday boy.

with his friends, cousin and only brother

 

with the other guests (jude's DBMS friends and their families)

theo's 3rd birthday celebrations

it's celebrations as it's not only one, but two celebrations for our little boy's birthday this year. since his kuya iñigo had his 3rd birthday celebrated in jollibee (lesson learned: don't start a costly tradition with the eldest) jude and i felt that theo must have a jollibee party too for his 3rd birthday. but since his birthday which is 4th of october this year falls on a weekday we had to schedule the party on a saturday unless we just want to see few guests for the party (jude loved this idea though, hehe). so i thought of throwing a small party in his nursery 1 class so he can also enjoy a birthday celebration in school. he enjoyed both parties. why wouldn't he... he was loooooooking forward to his birthday since his older brother's.

at last, his most-awaited day has arrived...

party in school.

inside the car. i could sense that theo felt anxious and excited whilewe're en route to the party place.

iñigo and theo's surprise dance number which the crowd loved. the daddy joined them at the last part.

blowing of the candle part.

me and my adorable little boy.

baby angel

it was first week of march this year when i thought of buying a pregnancy kit because i had a hunch that i might be expecting as my monthly period is delayed. i immediately bought one and checked myself the next morning. two lines registered in the bar. jude who was home that time asked me about the result as soon as i got out of the bathroom. i was sobbing... and i could not explain why. i was happy but my anxiety was more overpowering. i felt a pang of fear. probably because i wasn't sure how i will handle three kids and if jude can provide for them. 

but my fears vanished as excitement crept in. we broke the news to our family and friends that we're expecting when the hcG test and the ultrasound confirmed that indeed a baby is growing inside my tummy. the boys are equally excited. inigo, who was already bugging me since last week of february on what would be the name of their baby sister... a premonition probably... made himself more busy thinking of baby names. we also started to orient theo of his soon-to-be role and we fondly called him kuya theo. he was delighted.

a picture of baby angel

but the excitement only lasted for few more weeks. i experienced bleeding first week of april which prompted jude to bring me to the hospital on a holy thursday. should i say i was scared? i was. i was so scared! i could not look at my underwear everytime i peed because i was afraid to see blood stains again. the experience was traumatic.

i was discharged that  night as the resident OB, after doing an internal exam on me, said that my cervix is still intact. i squeezed her hands tightly upon hearing that out of relief, and most of all, out of joy. but she asked me to go back after holy week to undergo another ultrasound so we can find out where the bleeding is coming from.

so we--jude, the boys, and i--went back to st. luke's monday after the holy week. we have to tag the boys along as we don't have anyone in the house to leave them with. did you read s-t-r-e-s-s? anyway, we proceeded to the ultrasound room and waited for my turn. i conditioned myself to think positive, even when i sense that there's something wrong when the sonologist was checking me. i mustered enough courage to ask why, what's wrong, which forced the sonologist to be upfront. my would-be third baby has no more heartbeat. tears welled in my eyes. how can a life grow inside me and die inside me in a matter of days? what could have i done wrong to lead it to miscarriage? then the sonologist called for jude who was out in the lounge together with the boys. i could not forget the smiles in their faces as they were excited to see in the screen the newest member of our family. if i was sad, jude was devastated when the sonologist broke out the news to him. as he described it, the feeling was like all the energy was drained from his body as soon as he heard the news as he was not ready for it. he was that optimistic.

we went to see an OB (mine that time was in the delivery room) right after my ultrasound. i could not remember her name, but she was a very kind doctor who assured me first that it wasn't my fault that i miscarried. it was really due to happen. my first ultrasound revealed that my embryo's size wasn't normal for her gestational age. but by twist of fate i forgot to bring the film to my OB in one of my earlier check-ups that's why i wasn't forewarned that a miscarriage is imminent. it was really bound to happen. not because we went to davao for a trip... not because i was still carrying theo... not because i was cleaning the whole house and tending two active boys.

that night, part of our prayer changed. it was no longer "take care of baby inside mommy's tummy" but "we pray for baby angel." we call her our baby angel and we know she whispers to Papa Jesus prayers for our family.

*** 
as of this writing, baby angel could have been one month old now if God intended to give her to us. i could have been planning for her christening and buying her outfits for christmas. but it's not yet her time... we will be welcoming joyfully when it is. :)

we're past the seven-year itch

i have heard of the 'seven-year itch' from another married girl years ago. i wasn't so sure of its meaning that's why i had to google it. *palms to face* learning its meaning didn't make me anxious for our marriage and that it might happen to jude... as according to its meaning it's the husband who will start becoming unfaithful after being married for seven years... but i did wonder if the husband of that girl indeed cheat on her as she seemed to be scared that their 7th wedding anniversary was already coming. hehehe.

oh well... i just thought of this 'seven-year itch' idiom because two days ago, 8 october 2012, jude and i celebrated our 7th wedding anniversary...

now let the scratching begin! :D

photo taken by iñigo in the beachfront of las casas filipinas de azucar resort in bataan.

theo at two

he's no longer a baby...

but he is still my baby! :(

oh, the bittersweet feeling of seeing your kids growing up so fast. i am more sentimental with theo because who knows, he might be the last baby i cuddled and smooched. that's why as long as he is still round and filled with baby fats he will remain to be my baby. hope jude won't smack me for doing this... hehehe.

adorable-terrible is the apt term to describe theo at his age

theo is officially toddler now that he is two years old. and just like a normal toddler, he is curious, assertive, and feisty. thank God that my problem with his verbal communication skills already ended as he can already talk... and he talks a lot which is sometimes a major concern in our household especially when we need silence. lol. he started to talk when he was about 21 months old as his vocabulary expanded, learning new words aside from the "b"- beginning words he can already say since he was around one year old. before he turned two he can already speak in short sentences. but it's in early 2012 when he was around 28 months when he turned into a chatterbox and he started to be a source of entertainment in the house. i can not forget the evening when i thought his tales will never end as it ran for about an hour and he just talked about going to office someday and working for me and jude. :)

while his communication skills improved a lot, his gross motor skills lag behind. he's lazy when it comes to jumping and hopping which toddlers often love to do. our only consolation is he likes to join in in his kuya inigo's football class and runs and kicks ball in the sideline. at least we know that his eye-hand and foot coordination is okay.

but he is still one smart kiddo. we even assume that his very advanced for his age cognitive-wise. he thinks like a five or six year old sometimes. he never fails us to impress us with his reasoning skills which made him earn the monicker "attorney" from our kins. he thinks deeply and observes keenly and they manifests in his pretend plays - something he likes to do even when he's less than two years old.

few of his many pretend plays

just like his kuya inigo, he also loves to play with blocks and he builds whatever he fancies at that moment. he has loyalty to some of his toys. when he was a little younger, he's so loyal to his mickey mouse plushy that he can never sleep without it by his side. but when he got to know of thomas the tank engine character, his old thomas train toy (a christmas gift for him when he was 3 months old) soon replaced mickey and until now he brings it anywhere we go.

we have already enrolled him in the same school where his kuya inigo went for nursery and kinder. but prior to schooling, he's already versed with basic concepts like the alphabet, numerals, shapes, and colors. speaking of colors... color orange is his favorite and the orange crayon is the only thing he knows to use for coloring. hehe.

what else should i say about theo.... oh, he's a very affectionate or malambing kid! he loves to give me a kiss and sits on my lap. he never fails to thank me for almost anything i do for him... "thank you mommy for my otmeal (oatmeal).... thank you mommy for my food... thank you mommy for my new shoes."  this gesture compensates for the tantrums and feisty attitude he's throwing around which can really test my patience. but i just remind myself... he is at terrible two. :)